Saturday, January 21, 2012

Being a better friend...



Being a friend isn't just something that we do. It's a skill that we can learn and improve upon. I have learned many things over the past years about people and friendships. I have learned that some people value friendships less than others. I have learned that my childhood best friends will do just about anything for me, even though our lives are very different, our bond has never wavered. I have learned that MOST people in California are too busy to have the friendships that I had experienced in TN. I have also learned that I have different KINDS of friends. I have friends that I can cry to about anything and I know no matter what they are on my side. I have friends that make me laugh, and are fun to be around but I wouldn't tell them my deep dark secrets. (not that I have any haha) I have accepted the fact that I can not hold all my friends to the same expectations. I am sure I have let people down as well, and for that I am sorry. Friendship is important to me and I am going to try harder. These are three things that will help me be a better friend:

* I am going to like myself more.

When we genuinely like ourselves, we become more attractive to other people. We have more to offer others because we are not constantly focused on our own image and reputation. We become better friends because we don't cling. We are secure enough to spend time with a friend because we want to, not because we need to.

*Not all my friends will be the friend I need ALL the time

Some are good for laughter some are good for tears. It's ok if they can't give you advice during a difficult period.... but they might be able to make you laugh.
Relationships among true friends take a steady dose of time and energy--two resources in limited supply for all of us. I will identify the friends with whom I wish to create a closer bond. The closeness of my connections are far more important than the length of my guest lists.

*Make time!

Friends are important in many ways--so much so that these relationships often take on a life of their own. I owe it to myself (and to my friends) to make these relationships a priority.

To my besties, that never let me down....Thanks for being the pee in my pants.

2 comments:

Chezlie Davis said...

Beautiful words about friendship from the worlds best friend!!! Lisa, you are truly an amazing friend! Having your fierce, loyal, loving, strong, supportive, encouraging presence in my life makes me eternally greatfull. Your friendship catches me when I fall, protects me when I am vulnerable, lifts me up when I am down, loves me when I can't love myself, laughs with me when I need it, cheers for me when I need to celebrate. I am thankful for you and love you to bits!!!

Jessi said...

I've been meaning to write this for days...just kept remembering when I was on my phone and Lord knows how long it takes me to type on there!

One of my few "golden" friends, Lisa you are a piece of my childhood, a piece of my history. I am so very thankful for the friend you were to me as a kid, and just as thankful you have returned to me as a friend in my adulthood. Amazing people such as you and your family, as well as Chezlie and her family, helped to make my childhood as normal as it could be under the circumstances. You included me in family outings and vacations, sleepovers, etc. You made sure I got to school, made it softball practice, had rides to birthday parties, and so much more. Most importantly, you were there for me then and you are still here for me today. I know I could call you for anything (although I know I am terrible at picking up the phone). I love you my dear friend. Thank you for making my life--then and now--more vibrant. :) XOXO